Frustration

My younger sister has two grandchildren who have a birthday about ten days apart. This last Tuesday evening, family got together to celebrate both of them. After we ate, some went to the swings, others went for a swim in the pool, and others did various other things. One of my nieces and I sat down and had a long, good old fashion talk. What a joy it is to talk about life from a spiritual perspective. There were several things talked about that were noteworthy of a blog entry, but one that I will write about relates to a comment she made; “We need to frustrate our children from time to time to teach them boundaries.”

Parents today tend to be submissive; yielding to their children’s demands. It is easy for children, and adults, living in a materialistic society to desire many different things. If these desires are fulfilled, children soon come to expect more in the future, even if money is not available to pay for them. Children come to expect parents to sacrifice for them and as adults they then expect government to meet their needs.

What if parents were to frustrate their children and say no to some or even many of these requests? What qualities could be taught in the process? For one, consider the following two verses: “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interest, but also for the interest of others” (Philippians 2:3 – 4, NASB). We need to teach our children about balance; more for others and less for us. That is not popular, but once learned makes the Christian stand out as being different from the world.

Children need to be taught that less for them means more will be available to invest in kingdom work. When they ask why that is important, you now have an opportunity to teach what is really important in life; things close to God’s heart. One of those things close to God’s heart is his desire to give perfect gifts (James 1:17); one of those perfect gifts is the gift of salvation.

We need to teach our children the value of perfecting God’s love within them. Consider the value of joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control as compared to their worldly desires for things. What is the value of joy and peace for your child when compared to another computer game? What about kindness, goodness and gentleness when compared to having the latest electronic devices? Maybe it is time for some child frustration, needed to narrow their boundaries and sharpen their focus on things closer to the heart of God. What do you think?